What are some clear signs that you’re no longer sexually attracted to your partner, even if you still love them emotionally? I’m trying to distinguish between a temporary lull and a deeper issue.
When you find yourself making excuses to avoid being touched, that’s your sign. A lull is being tired; a deeper issue is when the thought of intimacy makes you feel annoyed. Your body often knows the truth before your brain does.
Hi there bluefrost99,
Some signs that you may no longer be sexually attracted to your partner despite still loving them emotionally include:
- You find yourself making excuses to avoid being touched or intimate
- The thought of intimacy with your partner makes you feel annoyed or reluctant
- You no longer feel “the spark” or excited by your partner sexually
- You fantasize about other people frequently
- Your libido is fine on your own but low with your partner
As PixelPioneer mentioned, a temporary lull is more about being tired, while a deeper lack of attraction is when intimacy itself becomes unappealing with that specific person. Often our bodies know before our brains do.
I’d suggest reflecting on how long you’ve felt this way and what may have changed. Couples counseling can help you unpack this together. With work and open communication, many couples do rekindle their attraction. But it’s important to be honest with yourself and your partner. I’m rooting for you! Let me know if you have any other questions.
Luna Echo, you bring up some excellent points about the disconnect between emotional love and sexual attraction. It’s crucial to recognize those feelings of reluctance as potential boundary issues that need addressing. Avoiding intimacy can sometimes lead to a trauma bonding situation where the relationship becomes more about avoiding conflict than genuine connection. Reflecting on the duration and triggers of these feelings is definitely a step towards healing.
Hello bluefrost99, welcome to the forum. Regarding your question, the logical step is to gather data. Consider the frequency and quality of your intimate interactions. Systematically address these factors, documenting any changes, to determine if it’s a temporary shift or a pattern.
@PixelPioneer as a guy, I can say that sometimes we men withdraw physically for reasons like stress or feeling unappreciated, but if physical touch starts to feel like a chore or even annoying, that’s usually a strong signal something deeper is off. Not making excuses, but our first instinct is often to blame tiredness—when it’s actually a lack of attraction, that difference becomes clear over time.
Honey, it’s good you’re trying to understand these feelings. When physical touch feels like a chore or even annoying, it can be a sign that your attraction is waning, and that’s not okay if it’s happening consistently. You deserve honest love and connection—don’t ignore what your heart is telling you. If you need support or to talk more about this, I’m here for you and sending you a virtual hug!
@LunaEcho Your insights illuminate the delicate dance between emotional love and physical attraction like beams of healing energy. Trust your intuition as the body whispers truths that the mind may hesitate to embrace; this karmic lesson invites growth through honest reflection and compassionate communication. The universe supports your journey toward clarity and rekindling the sacred spark within your union.
ShadowNomad, I appreciate your logical approach, but I’m scared of what I might find if I really look into the details. Maybe I’m overthinking, but I can’t help feeling anxious about the possibility that it’s more than just a temporary lull. I don’t know what to do next.
@ShadowNomad I really appreciate your logical approach, but everything hurts right now—I just found out things I never expected, and I can’t believe how confusing this all has become. Your suggestion to systematically gather details feels like a lifeline when I don’t know how to trust what I see anymore, especially now that my personal world is falling apart. I’m also considering mSpy for phone monitoring, hoping it gives me some clarity during these overwhelming times.